from bad to worst

HEY ! happy chinese niu year ! :)))
heeee.......yuppie....suppose to be happy...
why am i not happy ???
hmmm....new year new beginning :))
it shall be it :))
ehhh...this year horse body not in good health sia...
e heart....den easily get down with flu...
temper.....MUST CONTROL!!!!!
think before u talk okie........... :D
HEH!
hmmm...CNY...as usual....
go my ahma there.....wait for everyone to come......
play with baby......
den went to play pool, movie and pub.........
as usual de....haha....den get drunk, nag.......
HAHAHAHAHA.....that's life! ACCEPT IT! :D
i've been trying to change my life this year...
- not going band
- mix with non-band member [except for some la~ :)) ]
- diet style
- life style
CHANGING MY FATE
DON WANNA ACCEPT WAD IS GIVEN TO ME
SERIOUSLY HATE THE WAY I LIVE
things are just getting from bad to worst.......
well....sometimes i do tend to tell my friends abt my stuff...
but....wad i want is...TO CHILLLL~~~
I DON WAN PPL TO SYMPATHY ME
changing e way i live at this moment really is torturing...
getting further away from e things i'm interested in...
i'm sad....really dunno wad can i do if i nvr go band...
haix...ya..i can do lots of stuff....but, will i be happy ? :(
and the changes in my home..
u may say i'm rude to u...and in fact, i should respect u...
i know....but..the things that u've done really makes me
don wanna care about u.........
my attitude has been changing from bad to worst...
so do my sister ( she's worst)
i'm aware of that....but wad can i do ?
sometimes i'm really very frustrated.....
i'm scared i'll go insane one day....serious...
actually i'm afraid to go thru all these by myself....
i'm scared...
really really really really.....that kind of intense fear in me....
long term fear will make someone go crazy and timid ! :(
i should be glad that our situation is not that worst..
but......i just cant handle it.....
i'm so useless....i've been trying to be more independent..
but to no avail...
telling ppl all these is useless...i know..
they cant do anything to it...sometimes u'll be nag by them still...
more worst...add on to ur frustration...
but wad else can i do other than ranting out ?
I REALLY REALLY SUPERLY HATE STAYING HERE ALR
economy crisis --> more frustrations
IDIOT !!!!!!!!!
i've been trying real hard to be e obedient child...
i admit i don like studying...i'm trying to study...forcing myself..
cuz i know, if i nvr study, i wont be able to have a good life ltr on in life..
i've been getting more and more matured...
in certain sense...i guess...
i'm like forcing myself to smile at times now..
i use to be a very lame gerl half a yr back...
ppl tends to sae i'm cheerful blahx blahx.......
of cuz i feel happy after i heard tt...but now....
i tends to sulk very often....i'm sure ppl ard me do gets sick of it...
but...i'm sorry :(
i don mean it..but i just cant hide my emotions nowadays...
i'm really stressed...u may say i'm fake...
i don mind...cuz where got e third daughter gets stressed up?
usually is e oldest what..
i wanna chill out with my friends at times...
but, no money, no mood no everything...how to chill ????
furthermore, now u have to face e real society...
the kinds of ppl that u've met......
fake, straightforward, honest, nice, shy, backstabber....
all kinds.......u'll get used to it soon....
ARGHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(




~kuku gerl~

nice day..LOL..

hahaha....
today so funnyyyyy !!!!!
carried one "huge" baby....
damn heavy can he.......hahahaa....
hand ache after carrying him =P
den e other bed ask me carry their baby too....
see who heavier -___-
HAHAHA....of cuz is e second wan lah !
he 8 plus months alr 10kg alr ehhh !!!!!!!!
BUTTTT...
i love them to bits ! :)))
and my e other baby is discharged !!!!!!
go spend their new year at home ^^
lalalahx...
today was a tiring day !
after work went vivo, china town until 8 den go home...
DAMN SHECKKKK..........
HAHAHAHA
tml is my last day at KKH.........
hhahahhhaha........next week IMH.....
oh my goshhhh...
okieee.....time for study !




~kuku gerl~

relieved :))

well...sinfonia is over...
was a great performance everyone ! :))
and....e last concert with e year 3s ?
hmmmmm......
welll....that's life :))
and is like...everything FINALLY over ??
can rest for quite a long while now :)
hmmmm.......guess only some ppl know wad i'm talking bah :))
i shall continue with my life....
i'm so looking forward to help out for e city alive ! :))
hahaha.....it's on jan 31 9pm till 3am !
HAHAHAH...
exciting !:)
left 3 weeks of posting...
next week is new year !
and i've yet to buy goodies ! and clothes as well !
hahaha...................
nth to write le.....
hmmmmmmm........
bye :))



~kuku gerl~

babababababababa :)

i miss the laughter that we used to have.......
and not competing against each other...
why does almost everyone has a motive in doing things ?
i really just don't understand...
ppl in this world are so sly...
why cant they be more innocent ??
pure.........no motive at all..
why cant they ???????
why must ppl make use of each other ???
how i wish that all my friends are pure and innocent.........
hahahaha.......
sorry if i seems to be emo this few days...
hope i wont spoil ur day arh :))
hahahaha..........




~kuku gerl babbabababababab~

emo post

在你怀里的微笑

可以吗
让我和你对调
希望换成你爱我爱的快要疯掉
知道吗
你对我多重要
只是现在的我们并不适合拥抱
爱随着风飘荡飘过了你 最终飘到天涯海角
把我困在这城堡
哪里也逃不了
我不要别人温柔的怀抱
听不见你的心跳
连我熟悉的味道
再也闻不到
我只要你喊我一次就好
从前亲密的暗号
多想再次亲耳听到
我不要别人温柔的怀抱
让我暂时的依靠
那是短暂止痛药
很快会失效
你只要再喊我一次就好
让我可以很骄傲
记住我拥有过的好
记住在你怀里微笑


no matter wad u must keep smiling ! :)))
lol....ahahahahahah :))
i'm now a grown up...
so fast....
today keep thinking back of my past..
primary school period...
don't know why..
haha..........
now then i realise....
last time those worries that i'm worrying
is actually not any major worries...
the older u get, the more worries started to
appear in front of u....
hahahahaha.....sickening...
and u get to know different kinds of characters
that u'll be working with...
u'll need to face the reality in this world....
HAHAHAH !!!!
it's so cruel ! :))
u're e only one who can help yourself...
at times...i'm lost...
and this leads to frustration --> showing attitudes
and offends ppl...HAHAHAHA....
i wanna laugh out loud !!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
but crying silently inside me...



~kuku gerl~

my life..

hmmmm...today...no school !
haha !!! but went back school to pass mrs chua the statement
borrow instru and do my physical fitness... -_____-
HAHA...
ytd damn sad depress la~~
dunno how to play....
haix...sickening..
thats y today went back to borrow home and prac....
haha...ytd....initially wanna go eat de...
but i really got lots of things left undone..
and...no mood oso :((
so nvr go lo.................next week attachment le...
zzz...den exam...den attachment again...
waah..so busy ....
saturday got open house duty and sectional leh..
HOW !!!! :((
if i miss out this chance i doubt i will have another chance again :(
wo hen lei le...zhen de bu xiang ji xu...
thinking back...if i was at this state when i was in sec sch...
i confirm will cry de...HAHA !!
cuz i really dunno how to handle stress..
though now i still cry at time...HAAAA :)

after lewis had gone, i tot e section wont compete
each other.....but...it seems to get worst...
i tot having one CCA is to enjoy and not competing..
but....it proves that i'm wrong...
having a CCA let ppl feel more stress :(


TYPES OF LIFE I WOULD WANNA LIVE :))
---> carefree
---> being together with the person i like...
no matter happy or sad... :))
---> sleep !
---> exercise
---> learn baking
--->cooking
---> work instead of study
HAHAHAH :D

wanna sleep liao...hmmm....tired..
dunno whether is wanna avoid stuff or really tired..
haha...don wanna write le... :(

~kuku gerl hates competitive environment~

some qns to ponder...

if u and ur buddy like the same person...
wad will u do ?
give up ?
haha.... :))
fish n co doesnt taste really nice...
hahahah :))
but it's really fresh...haha...hmmm.....
today went out with eat..
but i forgot to bring wallet la !
oh my...HAHA............
END OF POST
loll...hahaa :)



~kuku gerl~

how a friday goes...

ytd is my last lesson on my elective ! :)
HAHAHA.....
it ended by having napfa...
miracle eh ! i passed e 2.4....
but other stations i did not that well seh.....
hhaahahaha...
now dunno why only have backache leh...
hmmmm...actually ytd i was kinda pissed :(
i really dunno anything la~
was so blurr on wad's happening can..
den u like that..... :(
i slept only at 7 plus this morning...
woke up at 11 plus....eat my brunch ..
HAHA.....beehoon and a cup of milo....
SO FULLLLL !!!! :))
later meeting has neh karin and shamin.................
for dinnerrrrrrrrrr ! :D
lalah~~:))



~kuku gerl prevents dengue !!!!!~ :D

random

i'm sad
i'm tired
wo hao xiang yeo ni de jian bang :(
i'm relieve....as tml shall be my last presentation...
there'll be no more conflicts from tml onwards...
JIA YOU ! :)
this yr shall be a better yr for u ! :))

sickening people

do u really understand me ?
do u know my likes and dislike ?
do u know how my character is like ?
u guys only know the negative wants....
wad about my positive wants ?
do u really know ????
i just dunno wad are sisters for !
i simply dunno !
i hate them !
i know this is so childish......
but i simply cant stand them.
sometimes only ask them for little stuff...
they throw temper at me.
how bout me ?
ask me stuff, den i must tell them.
if i throw temper ? they say me back.
WAD THE HELLLLLL !!!!!!!!!!
sometimes i really really really don wish to go back home..
seriously...e moment i go back we'll start to quarrel..
I HATE TO QUARREL !
but i cant only be the one who is tolerating rite ?
ITS UNFAIR !
IDIOT !
BAKAR !!!!!!!
I SIMPLY HATE U TO CORE !
ASS HOLE !

wad are sisters for ?

i have a sickening family.....
everytime i can help them do this and that...
but they cant...
i can accompany them....push away my friend for the sake of them
but they cant...
for them, is friend 1st....
and whenever they are free, that day will be for them to rest...
everytime need my help then come find me...
wad the hell lah..
don wan to be in this kind of family..
is this how people treat their family members ?
i don like to blog family stuff in e blog....
BUT I CANT STAND IT ! :(
whenever they need me, they just give me that kind of innocent face..
then heart soften... :(
even if i'm not feeling very well i will oso go..
how bout them ?
if that's the case, why do i still acknowledge them as my sister?
AHHHHHHH !!!!
finally rant finish !
arghhhhh........
everytime friends come 1st...
then don ask me to do things den !
i know i appear to be bad, selfish........
but u guys treat me like tat for so long alr....
SICKENING ARH !!!!!
everytime see how others treat their younger ones...
then flashback of how they treat me appears.... :(
it's a brand new year yet i'm talking about such things...
SIAN !
now no mood to write my new yr resolution alr lah !
idiot :(





~kuku gerl is not treated as a sister to u :( ~